Almost

December 11, 2008 at 9:21 pm | In Uncategorized | 2 Comments

I almost just didn’t post today.

I woke up after a lack of sleep. I tossed and turned all night and it plain sucked! PLUS I could barely breathe. PLUS I developed allergies all day. Sneeze after loving sneeze.

Luckily work was good, I didn’t stress out, and the kids were nice. Plans were well laid out and I didn’t have any difficulty.

I’ve scanned nearly 250 pictures thus far, and am currently scanning more.

I took two benedryl to try and make these allergies go away and therefore I am getting quite sleepy.

I can’t drink ANYTHING after 12am. Or eat, of course. But then at 10:15 or so I get to get put to sleep and.. ahh! So beautiful sleep truly is. Then I wake up, get taken home, and get to pass out! I remember during my last operations I laid on the couch and drank milkshakes. Mmm. No solids! I love it! But, of course, there will be pain. BUT then, of course, there will be drugs!

I started reading a book about Jesus to Nikki (a new easy kid-book from Borders) and then asked my dad to give me a history/religious oral history. So we sat on the couch and he started from the beginning and we got to talking about how he used to take me to Sunday School when I was little, and blah. So he mentioned that he wanted to go to Church on Christmas, and I told him I’d go with him. Now, let me tell you how we’ll be at my sister’s house and she is athiest/agnostic and deplores religion. It will be interesting. BUT then I mentioned about going here, more often, and he agreed. So we will start going to a Methodist church which is near our house. It’ll be a nice experience, I think.

Our cable is out, so no TV for me at the moment. BUT I’ll watch TV online and that’ll fix that problem for the moment.

Wish me luck tomorrow!

A Nice Thing

December 10, 2008 at 7:44 pm | In Uncategorized | Leave a Comment

Even with my doubts and misgivings about what I’m doing. There is one nice thing that sometimes comes up.

I got a call to sub tomorrow from a teacher at my old work, Haskell. She had called and left a messege and I called her back saying I could sub Thursday and Friday. Then I remembered my dentist appoint and called back to let her know I could only do Thursday. I told her that if she didn’t want to call me for just one day and instead get another person who could do both days.

Well, yesterday? She calls me to confirm Thursday telling me that: “I’d rather have someone good for one day, than someone bad for two days.”

Total compliment. She said I’m a good teacher! Awesome! I am so happy. That really makes me feel good!

Afraid!

December 7, 2008 at 11:21 pm | In Uncategorized | 3 Comments

I am so afraid.

I am afraid of getting a job. Or, rather, the process of getting it. I’m afraid of interviewing. What’s my teaching philosophy? I wrote it down. It’s on paper. But do I mean it? How do I express it in a way that impresses the interviewer? I stick my foot in my mouth plenty of times.

If, for some weird act of a miracle, I actually GET a job? ALL that other stuff that comes with it? Scares the SHIT out of me. For example? The principal or other experienced person in authority coming in an observing me. SCARY. Being evaluated. SCARY. Having to turn in grades from state tests. SCARY.

It might seem as though I’m getting ahead of myself. Worrying about these things when I’m far from even having an INTERVIEW for a job. But it’s scary enough that makes me want to get a job somewhere else. Somewhere easy. Somewhere working as a secratary. Somewhere doing something that is easy and that doesn’t have responsibilities as big and spectacular as those that come with being a teacher.

So, bottom line? I don’t know what I’m doing.

I feel as though I’m going back to get my masters for no reason at all. Or rather, to take up time. To make my parents proud. To do SOMETHING. Something other than sitting on my ass all day. If subbing work was more common, more every-day… then maybe I could just do that all the time. It’d be so much easier. No having to worry about lesson plans and all the other crap that comes teaching full time.

Or am I just scared because I’ve never done anything full-time before and am freaking out about growing up? About doing something with my life.

This goes back to the whole being in limbo thing. How can I do anything when I have no idea what I’m doing.

Okay, I’ll cough it up. I’m watching the new movie on CBS, “Front of the Class”. Look it up for details, but it’s basically about a kid who had Tourette’s Syndrome and as an adult he wanted to be a teacher, and his struggle to get the job, etc. I’m seeing all the hard work he put in to getting the job… and I feel as though I barely put in any effort. But am I just trying to be down on myself? Since the movie is, after all, a movie? Plus he did go to over 20 schools. How about the fact that there are no jobs? Because there aren’t. The economy sucks (as if you didn’t know that). California is hurting bad, and it’s trickling down to the LAUSD. WHICH is where I need to get a job. Jobs are non-existant, not just far and few between. There are NONE.

So… I don’t know.

6 Day Vacation

December 2, 2008 at 3:32 pm | In hours | Leave a Comment
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I work the rest of the week at 2 different schools in classes I’ve already worked in. Well, now that I called to get my job number for the job on Wednesday and Thursday – it’s not there. Hmph. I called and left a messege for the teacher at home, hopefully she’ll give me a call and let me know what’s up.

Well, anyway, if I DO work tomorrow and the rest of the week – MAN is it hard to get back to work after a 6 day holiday. I say 6 days because I didn’t, of course, work on Thanksgiving or the day after, then the weekend, and then I didn’t work yesterday or today. I started getting anxious about it, actually. BUT.

I think the reason for THAT was that I took two Vicodin for my back pain (prescribed to me!) and it knocked me out for 2 hours and now I’m awake, over heated and really not feeling like going to work tomorrow. But it’ll be good for me, being at home all day every day is not a good thing and I don’t have any other work lined up until January so I need the work when I can get it!

I had a dream last night, though, that I was working at Haskell and that I they needed a teacher and that I had a job! They needed me and gave me the job! Woohoo! I was all getting the class ready and it was just SO exciting. But then I woke up and realized it was all a bad dream. Bad because I woke up and it wasn’t true. Otherwise it was great.

But maybe it was telling the future and on Friday they’ll tell me they need me to cover a class? To take over for the rest of the year? I don’t know, but that would rock.

Work!

November 25, 2008 at 2:42 pm | In Uncategorized | Leave a Comment

Pay day was November 5th. I have yet to be paid. 20 days later. I found out 5 days ago that they didn’t even issue me a paycheck. But that got straightened out and I should have a check in the next few days. Hopefully.

In the meantime, still not a lot of work. I worked 2 days last week, and tomorrow I’m working 3 hours at Lim school. Covering IEPs. These are generally easy because I don’t have to do anything – just supervise. I don’t have to be there until 11am, so that’s nice. But it also means only 3 hours of pay.

But I’ll be okay, for now. Hopefully I can get a full time job sometime soon.

Limbo For Life!

November 17, 2008 at 2:14 pm | In Uncategorized | 1 Comment

(Cross-Posted in And So Life Begins…)

More significantly… I’ve been feeling as though I’m in limbo. Work, no work, work, no work. Never knowing exactly what my schedule will be like. Well, it sucks, basically. But I came to the realization today that, well, this is my life right now. There isn’t much I can do about it right now. That just means I need to get used to living life as it comes. It’s nice, because I have days where I don’t have to get up early or dress up or go anywhere… but it’s quite boring, too. I’d LIKE to go out and work, make money. I have 3 days booked in the next 2 months. Not good. I need about 15 more days to be happy.

That said, I think doing Substituting is a good experience. It gives me a bit of many classes and that will help me in having my own classroom some day. I need to start making good notes of what I like in each classroom. I need to look at the different aspects of the classroom and take a bit from it.

It’s a bit scary, though. I won’t make the 100 days/600 hours needed in order to get health care next year. So I won’t have health insurance that way. So I might be facing a lack of health care for a year. That would not be good, but there isn’t much I can do about it. I can get a job, hopefully. The other option would be for me to MOVE somewhere and get a FULL time job. Somewhere. Where? Maybe up north. A job. With benefits.

Alas, one step at a time must be taken.

I submitted my application for Grad School. Now it’s waiting to get the results and then take the GRE. Woo.

3rd Grade

November 13, 2008 at 10:16 pm | In pay check | Leave a Comment
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This will be my first time subbing in a 3rd grade class. I like 3rd grade. It’s that age that most teachers want. They don’t need to be babied so much, but they aren’t complete asses yet.

The classroom teacher, KL, gave me a call this evening while I was at the supermarket. I was on the phone when she called and so waited to come home to call her back. I’m glad I did. In the voicemail she left me she said that there was something that was too difficult to write down and she could explain them better over the phone. Once she did tell me about it, it wasn’t all that complicated. The class is having a debate, per se, and each side needs to finish their posters so that by Monday they can present. THAT doesn’t sound complicated.

The class is small, 16 students. Wow. They switch twice during the day, for ELD and for Reading. Not a problem for me.

I was going to make some photocopies of some activities for the kids if we have extra time, but I figure I’ll take them out to play OR just let them do something creative instead. Give them extra time to work on their posters, etc.

November has been a slow month thus far, but tomorrow is pay day for October. I’m really excited to get a paycheck! A nice one! It will be such a relief for my bank account and my credit cards and my brain.

Maybe an update on how it goes tomorrow.

4th Grade

November 6, 2008 at 9:02 pm | In Uncategorized | Leave a Comment
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Monday and Wednesday I spent in 4th grade. The class is nice but they are talkative. A couple of students with whom I bump heads. One I had to send to a Kinder class for 20 minutes. Yesterday it was good, I enjoyed it and I hope I get to go back to that class again. I think the teacher likes me, so hopefully!

Tomorrow I’m going back to Kinder. Different class, though. This one is back at Haskell for a teacher I never really worked with but I got along with. There is also an aide in the class who is an elderly woman who volunteers. She’s very nice and I’ve worked with her when I was there. He did tell me the class was a “tough” one this year, but I had to deal with an autistic kid in the last class, so I’ll be fine. Being THERE will also help. Although, I hope I can keep to myself a little bit.

Three Days!

November 2, 2008 at 7:13 pm | In Uncategorized | 1 Comment
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I am working Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I would also be working Tuesday, but that’s the election. Monday and Wednesday I’ll be in the 4th grade class that I was at to begin with at Lim school. I liked this class. It’s a GATE class – so they are smart (or at least not as low as others). Also, the teacher left me very specific instructions last time (and last time it was a sort of last minute sub that she needed) so I expect there to be lots of good instructions. She needed me for M-W, but unfortunately because of Tuesday I can’t do it all three days. Ah well. M & W it will have to be!

Then on Friday I’m subbing at Haskell for Kinder. The teacher, PS, already told me that the class is a tough one this year – but I just did a tough one the other day, so I hope it won’t be too bad!

Regardless – it’s 3 days of work! In one week!

One?

October 29, 2008 at 5:09 pm | In hours, pay check | Leave a Comment
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One day? Nope! I just got a call from another teacher at Lim school – she needs a Sub for tomorrow cause she is damn sick. Trust me, she is. She sounded like she was 80 years old she’s so sick! Luckily she thought ahead of time and made plans for a sub before leaving work today.

That makes me feel better.

Fucktards. So I have access to the hours that I will be paid for in a time period, right? so I went and checked and saw that I have 35 hours, which okay. BUT the first 6 days that I worked at L school? Not on there. So the SSA or SAA or whatever she is has NOT submitted my hours/days for payment. Today was the deadline! So I’m only getting those 35 hours. Or 5 (6 hour) days and 1 five-hour day. So my big ass check isn’t going to be so big ass anymore. It’s going to be $865 for those 5 days and then $144 for the 1 day. A total of just over $1,000. BUT that’s before taxes. So maybe $900? Not sure. While it SHOULD have been $2,047. So I’m a bit pissed off right now. tomorrow during a break I’ll call Iv (the person at L school in charge of it) and see if she’s going to get this done. Now, I should have checked days ago and made sure it was in for this paycheck, BUT I couldn’t log on and couldn’t find ANYTHING. So I decided to try again now – and I id find it, thank goodness.

Buck Fuck! I want my money!

This is going to be cross posted in my other blog.

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